Never forget
I figure that getting an elephant would help me find my keys. I could let it remember where I put them and ask it to find them again… or I could just attach my keys to it and rely on the fact that it’s pretty difficult to lose an elephant.
Actually it’s not that I forget so much as it is that I have man-blindness… I can be looking directly at the thing I’m looking for and still not see it.
This applies to nearly all objects whether they are located in the fridge, a cupboard or even in plain view.
Whilst I have met many men that suffer from this, I have yet to hear of a woman that has the same symptoms.
It’s either that they have greater understanding of the problem and a higher level of competence to solve it… or that they are using witchcraft.
In my house, it’s exactly reversed – my wife suffers from “man-blindness” and I’m the one who generally finds the thing she’s looking for. It’s all very strange, and I’m relatively certain that the space-time continuum takes an unexpected spike around our home. It might explain why all those quantum physicists keep camping out in my front yard with all their gear.
Like some sort of twilight zone?
I’ve heard that if you tip a quantum physicist upside down, somewhere, a linked quantum physicist will flip in the opposite direction.
That sort of philotic bond makes me wonder – if you speak into the ear of a quantum physicist, can you receive the communication from the mouth of his/her counterpart? That would certainly redefine the ‘invention’ of the ansible.
now I’ll have to try it
I am female, and I have “man-blindness”. Glasses cases, glasses, keys, wallet, phone, dishes, pencils, pens, books, anything and everything. I sure could use an elephant…
“Glasses cases, glasses”
It’s not just man-blindness is it?
I obviously got this wrong, since the majority of responses highlight that it is actually the ladies that suffer from it… or rather they own up to it.
I’m not entirely sure that attching an elephant to everything that you own would help… but at least you could move house quickly using a stampede.
I have man blindness and I’m a lady…Or maybe it’s just youngin’ blindness, and I’ll receive a box of witchcraft on my 19 birthday with a bottle of rum attached.
youngin’ blindness – dunno why, but that really made me laugh.
I, too, am a lady and a youngin’. I hereby pronounce my sponsorship of the Youngin’-blindness theory!
..sounds like Jungian Blindness. Interesting.
One day it will be a famous theory, and children will learn about it in school. The girls will eagerly look forward to their magical gift box, and the boys will scowl in corners.
I have not heard of Jungian Blindness, although you can bet your dollar that I’m going to google it now.
As if there’s something wrong with using witchcraft to help solve life’s little problems!
Hrumpf!
Mama Kelly
LOL
Why not? I bet you’re the sort of person that never has to stop at traffic lights*…
*Another sure-fire way of spotting a witch.
in addition to man-blindness i misplace stuff while I’m holding it
Ha. I once accused someone of stealing my pen, whilst I gestured towards them with my pen in my hand.
I only misplace things if I have someone cleaning up after me who puts my things away. I don’t care if it looks cluttered leaving them out, cramming all my things into a drawer makes it impossible to find them when I need them.
There’s a lot to be said for the ‘chaotic’ filing sytem… more likely to bump into something you need, but conversely more likely to bump into something you don’t.
I’ll show you a picture of my ‘office’ some time, that will make anyone feel better about their levels of tidyness.
i think there was a study not too long ago on the work habits of people with messy work spaces and those with tidy ones. the ones with messy workplaces were better at finding stuff quickly
Hmmm, I vote witchcraft.
Lets burn them, but first, I need a fix for my sore back, and I have some bits that drip…..
I don’t suffer from man-blindness so much as just general blindness.
It occurs to me: there’s no way an elephant would fit in my house.
what? no!
I am sure that there is a charity for ppl like you who also suffer from elephant housing issues..
It is a major problem in some parts of the world
Who are you, who is so wise in the ways of science?
I don’t get to say this too often… but I don’t understand.
Burning witches? Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Hmmmm?
Also: I’m not receiving comments notifications, though it still says “You are subscribed to this entry.” at the bottom of the page. Very peculiar.
It *should* work again next post… which will be up in a matter of hours.
I don’t know why it’s saying that you are already subscribed if it’s not sending the mail.
You could always try ‘unsubscribing’ and then leaving another comment, subscribing again… but that’s not ideal.
How many of you have this problem?
Nothing to see here, it’s just a test to make sure the comment notifications are working.
I forget where I put my keys all the time.
I set things down without thinking and
have to look for them afterwards. I’m
good about birthdays & holidays, but
that’s because those things are less
random than where I put my keys.
I can usually find everything unless one variable changes.
In other words, if my husband asks to borrow my elephant, I might as well kiss it goodbye forever, ‘cos I’m never gonna see it again.
As long as he cleans up the mess,
Gw, I’m guessing he can keep it.
I totally have man blindness even tho im a girl. it drives my mother, roommates, and boyfriend crazy.
Let’s all just calm down and ask ourselves a little question about elephants and their supposedly flawless powers of recall:
What in the hell do they have to remember?
EXT. THE ZOO
ELEPHANT: Am I gray?
The ELEPHANT stands silently in deep thought, the picture of disciplined meditation as he attempts to locate the single memory in his vast sea of knowledge and experiences, a color, his color, a superficial detail but one of vast importance if only to enforce that most empowering of adages for the noble beast, the notion that he, fallible in every other respect, never forgets. After what seems an eternity of fruitless searching, the answer reveals itself.
ELEPHANT: Yes. Yes I am.
Triumphant, he resolves to have a nice bowel movement, and does so immediately.
Warning you are about to read a 30 year old joke.
How can you tell if you have had an elephant in your fridge?
The hoof marks in the butter of course.
What do you get if you cross an elephant with a sparrow?
A broken clothes line.
(Do you guys have sparrows and clotheslines in the states?)
Yah, but we don’t use them much.
my friend couldn’t find something she needed once. we were at school, and she asked our teacher if she knew where it was. our teacher has a small child, and wanted to know if my friend had had a mother’s look or a child’s look. my friend replied, “a child’s look,” so our teacher looked and found it. have you noticed during our conversation that blindness is apparent in men and younguns? the answer is simple!
have children.
Yes, be all that you can be,
be a baby factory.
Von Neumann Machines! That’s the answer to curing blindness.
Then you’ll be able to find the missing toys, but never again your sense of independence …
Too grim?
Grim, grim joy, parenthood…. pure joy… and worry!
Well, when that happend to me and my dad was around, he’d say: “If it was a snake, it woulda bit ya.” . Such wisdom.
my grandpa says that
I’m a woman who has man-blindness.
Then again, I’m generally considered to have a man-brain in most aspects, so I may not be the best example…
Aha! Multigender blindness…
I’d like to see a Steve Martin film, ‘The Woman with a Man’s Brain’…
That would be a truly epic film of epicness. *sage nod*