May 5th, 2008
Excuses
I’m sorry if I haven’t been responding to your comments these last couple of days, but, without wanting this to sound like an excuse, I’ve been making the most of the Mayday bank holiday.
It’s been a print and crop fest… they’re very nearly ready.
That said, I’ll be back to my normal self, albeit covered in permanent ink, by tomorrow.
In the meantime, to keep you all entertained, and to give me something to read, what are your best excuses?
Oh, and before I go, I noticed this today… I think regular reader, Roo, beat him to the punch with this.
Ms Em on 
justine on
I used “lag” as an excuse for turning up to a college lecture late once.
/b
genius.
Currently, my best and also my most truthful excuse would have to be “Chronic Fatigue Syndrome”.
It’s not funny or witty, but it works.
People who wear fatigues strike me
as a bit odd. What’s with camo pants?
Do people wear them so you can’t see
their pee stains?
They wear them so that you cannot see the bottom half of their body.
They just blend in so well, you see.
People wear fatigues? I’m going to guess this has an alternative meaning to just tired.
Explain, per-chance?
The word does indeed have several meanings:
* Fatigue (medical) - tiredness in humans
- Chronic fatigue syndrome - an illness of the central nervous system
* Fatigue (material) - failure by repeated stress in materials
* Battledress - military uniform, also known as fatigues (BDU or ACU)
* Battle fatigue - see combat stress reaction and post-traumatic stress disorder
* Voter fatigue - public apathy about elections
Notice how they can be combined to form ‘battle fatigue’ though… I like that.
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome… you won’t hear me making jokes out of that though, terrible thing that it is.
I *think* fatigues is a certain type of military clothing.
I’m unsure of the distinctions, but I *think* it refers
to informal military attire, as opposed to formal (or
dress) attire. Isn’t Chronic Fatigue Syndrome the
desire to wear only casual, wrinkly “everyday” clothes?
I don’t generally make excuses, because I don’t really lie. Partly because I’m not good at it, partly because I can’t keep track of them at all. I don’t usually need excuses, though, as I’m rarely late. I hate being late for things. When I am late I usually have a genuine excuse. The last one I recall was that my alarm didn’t wake me up and my scooter wouldn’t start. I don’t ride the scooter anymore, though, so now it’s all about the unreliability of the local public bus system.
Also I tend to think the xkcd thing is different enough because it ends in a bloodbath. I think since the first spork was created certain odd people have had the hybridizing of utensils on the brain. I think it’s a science in its own right by now.
It doesn’t always work out, though- someone tried to hybridise the fork with the knife, and wound up with a musical instrument and part of Scotland.
/b
I tend to agree… Sporks are just funny. It’s bound to happen that multiple people will fabricate jokes surrounding such a funny utensil. And besides, Randy (fellow that draws XKCD) is a friend of a friend of a friend; I’d hate to think he was ripping ideas off other people.
But… Roo’s strip was an actual spoonerism… it’s a double-layered cake of pun… and funnier for being so.
I also doubt that Randall saw this, but I just wanted to point it out because I get emails saying ‘XKCD has done that comic’ even though it was up here first.
i need a good excuse for turning up in the wrong class. i do that a lot.
lately I’ve been getting lost in thought and ending up in physics class
I used to do that all the time at University… I’ve sat through some pretty diverse (and often incomprehensible) lectures as a result.
Fortunately no one asked questions.
I always found just standing up and walking out is perfectly acceptable… give no excuse, just pretend that that’s what you’re meant to do.
Either that or try and convince everyone else that they are in the wrong class.
I get provided transport to work now, so I don’t really have any excuses to be late.
As for late deadlines, etc, excuses aren’t allowed, so we just deal with the consequences, which is normally pretty interesting.
A double-layered cake of pun? I like that.
I like Roo. He has wisdom beyond his ears.