Dox mart
Here’s the night-time artist’s paradox – despite being on temporary vacation from my day job, I find myself busier than ever…
I think it has something to do with working for myself, I’m a harsh boss and my deadlines are tight… If I carry on treating me this way I may quit.
Anyway, that wasn’t the point of this post, merely an observation. What I wanted to talk about is the ever growing trend for people to make brand-name foods at home.
There are quite a few sites out there that apparently have instructions on how to replicate some of the world’s most famous foodstuffs… Coca Cola, KFC, etc.
Firstly, I’d be happy to hear from anyone that has had any success in this field. Purely as an experiment I find it fascinating, however, it is a bit like setting your sites a little low. If the best thing you can think of doing to a piece of chicken is to try to make it taste like the reclaimed meat of a fast-food outlet then I think there’s a problem.
So that’s what I’m after, the food that tastes better than the shop-bought, mass produced fare.
That exists, doesn’t it?




















It horrifies me that Taco Bell sells meal kits at the market. Like it would take some level of genius to replicate a burrito on your own without help. “What comes after the tortilla?”
As for cooking, I loathe doing dishes (even with the aid of a dishwasher) so I’ve perfected a lot of one dish meals.
One dish meals are great.
Even better if you can eat straight out of the dish aswell.
There are some valid reason to cook with just one dish.
Keeping flavouring in.
Reducing washing up.
Keeping flavouring in.
Keeping flavour is really important.
Burritos obviously require expert guidance to assemble, a bit like a car or nuclear powerstation.
The dishes thing… I used to hate doing them too, then somehow it changed. It now provides me with 30 minutes of care-free thinking time and all the soapy water I can stand.
Still, one-dish… or even the mythical no-dish meals are the best. It’s as close to old-school cooking as you can get.
I’d have to fully agree with that observation, striving to recreate a Twinkie (outside of science class) for instance just seems a little bit off and definitely aiming low.
Unless you are planning on using it for construction purposes… I see that some one has mentioned their almost immortal qualities below.
I’ve never tried one, but through the imported pop culture references it feels like I have.
Must endeavour to try one, once.
That KFC recipe is actually the basis for my usual chicken rub. It’s nice, but I’m not sure how close it is to the modern KFC spice mix. It tastes a lot closer to the BBQ (Korean fried chicken chain) chicken finger coating mix.
Since we can’t get Shake & Bake in Korea I often make simulated fried chicken with “Fake & Bake”. Mix some of the aforementioned spices in with some flour, bread crumbs, and a little bit of baking powder, roll the chicken in it and bake. It’s really good.
*gets urge to hunt fried chicken*
dude, you don’t even know. the days that i supposed to be off of work, i seem to work ten times as hard with the noir project and/or my web design company. its insane.. but fun, i love being busy.
…meant to add.. glad im not alone on that and good observation.
It’s a lifestyle choice it really is. All of my friends are in the same boat… we get up, work a pretend eight hours, get home and work a real eight hours.
Time off from my pretend job (the one that pays my rent) is just more time for my real one, and despite the lack of sleep or the increasingly worrying amount of coffee consumption, I have to say I wouldn’t change it.
Do remember though, take a step back sometimes and admire your own work. It’ll remind you why you do it.
I find it really disturbing how over packed supermarkets are with premade meals and foods.
I’m pretty sure I can make mac cheese from scratch faster then the packet mix and tastier, and mine has little bits of cheese to snack on while cooking.
And little bits of cheese call for crackers, dips, sundried tomatoes and wine.
Pack mix just doesn’t end the same way.
It seems so overwhelming the number of plastic encased food items, lit by fluoros and held in place by wire, attended to by underpaid kids and browsed by the mass of lazy and uneducated.
Cooking and good food are possibly the most sensous, innocent and simplest of the pleasures on earth. Food is the only art form I am naturally blessed to be proficent in.
Damn, I love food.
Note to self: learn to cook
One of the top ten things you can do with your life.
This comment is resopnsible for this slight rant:
http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/08/06/above-all-that-rubbish/
I concur, and thanks.
Some questions for the Americans here.
What is a poptart, praline, twinkie, etc?
I’ve never seen any of those here.
Watch Wall-E for a wonderful send up of the twinkie.
Poptart = toaster pastry
Praline = candy-coated almond
Twinkie = sweet snack-food that survives the apocalypse
A poptart is essentially a breakfast cake that amounts two pieces of shortbread with a small layer of jam between them and then coated with a hard icing. You put them in the toaster and heat them.
Prailines are a type of cookie I believe.
Twinkie is a yellow cake with white icing in the middle and is known for never going bad and lasting forever.
All three foods are highly processed and really not healthy at all for you.
Actually a praline is a sugar-coated nut, normally almonds or hazelnuts.
They’re also ground up for use in baking and chocolates.
Nougat though, I’ve always wondered what that is… even after looking it up I’m confused.
Hmmm, poptarts aren’t as much fun as I thought they would be.
Praline sounds boring.
Twinkies I can live with out.
I think I’ve seen nougat being made, not sure, couldn’t speak the language of the guy doing the making bit.
Pop tarts are AMAZING. Who wouldn’t want a toasted squashed, dry-as-bones shortbread with tacky filling??? My teeth hurt just thinking about it!
oh dude, dude
nougat is like…well its really hard, but in a chewy kind of way
and its kind of light and airy but its really sweet
and you usually put nuts and fruit and good stuff in it
basically its like…a really hard, chewy, fantastic marshmallow?
too difficult to explain, i advise you just eat vast quantities of nougat til you work it out exactly
umm… the only food i wish i could duplicate
in my own home is pizza. gino’s east in chicago.
old chicago pizza in petaluma. north beach pizza
in san francisco. even maybe round table pizza.
i can never get the crust right…
petaluma! thats a random city to throw out there.
it’s not so random if one lives in the bay area.
true, i was just going by big cities, chicago, san francisco…petaluma. i’m in sacto my self unfortunately.
It is funny the massive differences in pizza.
You can get chain store pizza’s that everyone likes, even me, or you can get the little corner resturaunts, the one with the wood fired ovens, that only a few ppl like, even tho they are made with love and fresher ingredients.
I actually kinda prefer my wife’s… store bought crust and then throw everything we’ve got on it and into the oven for 5 or 10 minutes… roast beef, brocolli, whole cherry tomatoes… whatever. : )
Junk food junkies like myself are very particular and homemade versions never taste quite the same. They may taste better to someone with properly functioning tastebuds, but to us they just taste wrong.
And I hate cooking.
Per you question Adam, isn’t the answer All other food?
Not quite all, my stepmum can make an amazingly average beef stew.
I think she must have a shaker of bland sprinkles or something.
Ha… I had to re-read that twice, amazingly average…
You have just invented a meme, maybe. Anti-flavor.
haha, yes, I think anti flavour is it.
I’m glad that some one had to do a double take.
Peach-cantaloupe soup….
Cook half a dozen peaches in honey, with a little cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves. Set aside to cool, in the refrigerator. Skin and cube a large cantaloupe, and combine it with the peaches, once they’re good and cold. Blend the whole mass till it’s smooth, chill thoroughly, and serve with a spoonful of yoghurt and a sprig of mint.
I’m pretty sure that would kill me. Sounds nice tho.
Kill you? How is that possible?
Also, I’ve forgotten two things… you cook the peaches with a couple spoonfuls of lemon juice, and when you blend it up, add orange juice till it’s the consistency you want (ought to be fairly runny).
You forgot three things, the last being alcomahol.
You know…. it could work with vodka!
Oh, thank heavens, now it sounds perfectly innocuous.