http://theflowfieldunity.com The Flowfield Unity Webcomic Wed, 06 Aug 2008 17:41:53 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en Some people are born tidy, others have tidiness thrust upon them. Humans, by and large, are pretty filthy creatures. Not only do they produce a vast amount of waste, they're just not that willing to clean up after themselves. If there's one thing that illustrates this it is their propensity for ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/08/06/above-all-that-rubbish/ I was asked the other night what my target audience is, regarding this comic. I replied, 'I don't have a target, I just like to fire randomly into the dark and hope I hit something other than the neighbour's cat'. Turns out this isn't the sort of answer publishers like to ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/08/05/its-a-hit/ Here's the night-time artist's paradox – despite being on temporary vacation from my day job, I find myself busier than ever... I think it has something to do with working for myself, I'm a harsh boss and my deadlines are tight... If I carry on treating me this way I may ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/08/04/dox-mart/ War – huh – what is it good for? http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/08/03/x-versus-y/ Two very good friends of mine are getting married next week – a reason to party if ever you need one. Normally I dread stag night parties, I'm just not the 'get blind drunk, have a curry and insult the staff before heading to a strip club only to get thrown ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/31/staggered/ I could probably count the number of times I have slept alone in the last decade on my fingers – that's not a boast, merely a statement of dependency. The lovely Em has gone to visit her clan this week, and unfortunately I was unable to accompany her. This has given ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/30/sound-asleep/ As regular as clockwork it arrives, that feeling of 'what have I done with my life?'... and it's hard to ignore until you look at the big picture. This isn't a motivational speech, but the truth is, that a life lived is a life worth living, no matter how mundane and ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/28/its-not-so-bad/ You know you've made it when you get your first stalker... indeed, at some point in the future, just before the celebrity tax is introduced, having a stalker is a mandatory requirement for appearing on the television. So, I thought I would help out, a bit of charity work, and start ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/27/innocent-stalker/ Ronald Reagan had a great way of sizing up his political competitors. Apparently at the start of a meeting he would hand out a jar of jelly beans – He later explained, 'You can tell a lot about a fella's character by whether he picks out all of one color ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/24/water-torture/ God, like Ming the Merciless, was big on plagues. Egypt had to endure ten of them: rivers and other water sources turned to blood killing all fish and other water life. amphibians lice or gnats beasts or flies disease on livestock unhealable boils hail mixed with fire locust darkness death of the first-born of all Egyptian families. I particularly like 'hail ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/22/intermittent-plague/ It looks like we are in for a slightly less interesting Olympic games this time – there will be less drugs and more limbs. British athlete, Dwayne Chambers, has been told that he won't be representing our country... which comes as no surprise since he was caught using performance enhancing drugs. ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/21/lone-distance-runner/ As part of Apocalypse Ready, I was window-shopping for a safe room the other day – I have no intention of buying one, there's something about them that makes me think of elaborate coffins... that and Jodie Foster... Looking at the classic piece of British literature, Protect and Survive ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/20/and-underground/ I know I have written about graffiti before... last time I introduced you to one of my heroes, Social Pest. However there have been some developments, and this week has all been about the cans. The week started with the news that wall-decorating British artist Banksy had been outed again. Apparently ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/19/off-the-wall/ Breakfast, the most important meal, or so they say... I suppose that's true if it causes you to commit some sort of atrocity... which is highly likely in my case, not being a morning person, pretty much anything can set me off. Sour milk – Whether on cereal or in my ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/17/a-way-to-start-the-day/ I almost can't believe we got this far without a palindrome appearing. I managed to cram three into the comic whilst still trying to make some sense, but I just couldn't get saippuakalasalakauppias (Finnish for 'soapdish bootlegger') to work. The great thing about palindromes being that they are half as difficult to ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/15/a-palindromic-comic/ The internet can be blamed for many things... the proliferation of pornography, the harvesting of 'personal' data, annoying Hollywood... pretty much anything you'd care to mention really. That said, one thing you can't accuse it of is destroying radio. Before the internet, radio came in two flavours – local and national. ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/14/power-plug/ Whenever the going gets tricky it will run out on you. Scientists will study this effect in an attempt to find out where it goes to. Results will be disappointing as the scientists too will suffer an shortage of time. That said, extrapolating from their earlier results, they conclude the following ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/13/slippery-time/ I'm almost too indignant to write... I was sat finishing off today's comic when Em walks past with a rather nice chocolate dessert. 'I would have got you one, but you're still colouring in,' she said. I'm not sure which is worse, the slight against my artwork or the lack of dessert. Anyway, ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/10/70s-unplugged/ Dear Commissioning Editor, I have an idea for you. I have noticed that you have a soft spot for historical drama, and we all know that you would much rather commission a series that, in many ways, is exactly the same as another successful series.  With this in mind I present to ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/09/a-timon-a-place/ OK then: The worst thing to hear when slipping under the anesthetic http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/08/faith-in-science/ *Thinks to himself, 'which way am I going to go with this? ...I could drone on about the state of humanity, the representation of science in the media or perhaps animal traits in humans'... then realises that this being The Flowfield Unity it has probably been said before and that ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/07/a-terrible-pun/ I don't know just how much coverage our current epidemic is getting worldwide, but here in the UK we're experiencing what can only be called 'Stabfest'. I still haven't been able to find any figures that suggest we have a higher rate of knife crime than any other comparable nation, but ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/06/beware-kitchenware/ It's an odd thing to meet someone famous. You already know them, you've seen them on TV or in films, you've listened to their records.. and somehow they are, all of a sudden, a complete stranger again. They even look different – some are shorter, others are far larger, they ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/03/twinkle/ If the films are to believed the future will be run by computers... and whilst we can get a little hysterical about the world-conquering type, I'd like you to spare a moment for our slave computers. They are the ones that we have chained to a lifespan of domesticity... they're in ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/02/toasty/ There are two types of people... those that think animatronics are better than CGI, and those that are wrong. There's something about having several people stuffed into a latex alien that makes it more believable. Take Jabba the Hutt – an intimidating monster reduced to a large slug by computerised animation. There's ... http://theflowfieldunity.com/2008/07/01/thicker-than-blood/